GODs FAITHFULNESS > our performance

Our performance doesn’t enhance or reduce God’s faithfulness. And with that opening sentence, it is my utmost privilege to report that God is still in the salvaging business despite our idea behind our own personal usefulness.Sarah and I recently participated in a youth event in Pennsylvania where I was the keynote speaker of the night.  I’ve done this particular “presentation” before, which requires PowerPoint slides and embedded video; for it is the most structured way  to tell my story without getting caught up in certain areas and timelines. Time is always ticking, which requires me to be as concise and fluent as possible when jumping from time zone to time zone in my life.  It really is quite a challenge to condense my testimony into a 45-60 minute talk, considering how just the happenings in prison alone could keep me talking non-stop for 4 years and 7 months! Yes, that much, and so much more, happened in that amount of time.However, after this last speaking engagement, I felt as if I was not as polished or fluent as times past. I felt as if I had failed in my delivery—and whether it was the enemy or myself—I kept beating myself up for fumbling the ball…even though I am usually confident and comfortable with the ball.And the reason I share about this nagging  “dropped” performance is to stress that our performance doesn’t enhance or even reduce the consistency between God’s faithfulness and how His Holy Spirit performs in spite of us. This was so evident because when all was said and done--God still remains the game changer and top performer.In fact, it is His performance, not ours, that ultimately draws all peoples to Himself.  We are just the conduits that He chooses to do it through. And it was at the end of this event where the only power point that mattered most was the point of power that each student came to know.Students still responded and caught the gospel regardless of me feeling as if I had dropped the ball. And that’s the redemptive performance that always follows Gods faithfulness.I’m sorry, here’s one more sports analogy (I can’t help myself!): God is the One who pitches the gosBALL out, and He’s even responsible for hitting the pitch even when we strike out.  Jesus said, “No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him” (John 6:44).So thankful for the reflection and introspection in this experience, lest I ever think it’s my own performance and ability that is doing anything victorious.