NO MO FOMO!

Once Matt and I were married, one of the first things we did was dive into youth ministry. We loved it, and still feel very called to that age group. But a common theme that I heard consistently with these millennial's was...”everyone’s life is fun besides mine”... “why don’t I have that one BEST friend like everyone else does”…“I know God loves me so why do I always feel so lonely?"‍

Feelings of loneliness are REAL and comparing your life with someone else’s is the key ingredient to strangling out joy. But guess what, it’s not only high schoolers and teens feeling that way. Just recently, around Thanksgiving, I found myself scrolling through Instagram stories of all the jolly Friends-giving gatherings that I didn’t receive an invite to, and I began asking myself “what’s wrong with me?” I am 26 years old, married, with a baby, so why do I feel the need to whine to God about my life and even buy into the lie that my life is not as fun as everyone else’s lives.

If you are reading this, thinking to yourself that I’m crazy, maybe jump off now because this isn’t for you; but if you feel like you continuously catch yourself feeling that way (left out), then hang tight.

I think as we head into the Christmas season, it’s important to take hold of these thoughts, because guess what, FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) is a real thing. Not just for the middle schooler that didn’t get invited to the movies, but also for the person who doesn’t live near family and might be spending the holidays alone. FOMO does not discriminate. It strikes the person who is single on the holidays, longing for someone to simply cuddle and watch a movie with. It attacks the couples trying to appease EVERYONE (in-laws, siblings, grandmas), even though they’d rather keep the holidays simple and just keep it to “us-time.” The list goes on….

I, by no means, am the ultimate source of wisdom, but let me attempt to lighten your load by throwing a few things out there.

First of all, when people post on social media (which I am 100% NOT against AT ALL), do you think they share the awkward encounters or moments of tension (because its life and those things happen)? NOPE! We all stage the boomerang toast and the most eventful moment of the evening. We share the candid laughs and gorgeous cookies, that in reality tasted like cardboard—leaving the social media world thinking we had the time of our lives. Is it wrong to capture the "moment"? HECK NO! But don’t dare in your scrolling fall into the danger of thinking Facebook reveals the actual reality of that “moment.” ‍

HEAR ME ON THIS: Fellowship is crucial and nothing beats getting together with loved ones, but you better believe that me and my sisters fight like the Jerry Springer Show as we attempt to get that perfect selfie with the perfect VSCO filter. Just saying!  And if you are anything like me and have come to the faulty conclusion that everyone’s life is more glamorous than yours...remind yourself (like I repeatedly do), that social media is a highlight reel and many of those captured moments probably aren’t even real.

Secondly, and back to FOMO, I’m starting to realize that in the fear of not wanting to miss anything, we end up missing everything. Matt recently posted his daily dose to his website and it made SO much sense. It convicted me personally. He wrote, “We will never be content in the next if we are not able to be content in the now.” In other words, instead of constantly looking around to what you don’t have or what you’re not doing (compared to others), begin focusing on where God has you and what He wants you to be doing with the gifts He has given you. Contentment comes to our heart when we add God to the concept of FOMO. We should fear missing out on His PEACE. We should fear missing out on His PRESENCE (which He freely gives us when we are FULLY living in the present).

Finally, if you are like me, you will most likely quickly scroll to the next pic or post and almost forget everything you just read. FOMO will creep back in when you least suspect it. However, if nothing else, remember this—in the moments where you feel left out or feel less than because of other peoples “seeming social success,” I want you to know that Jesus is enough and He thought you were enough to die for. He truly is the reason for the season…from the manager to the empty tomb. He sees you and with HIM we can have NO MO FOMO! Get it?

Merry Christmas friends!

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